Emus and kangaroos cannot walk backwards, and they are on the Australian coat of arms for that reason...
Boy those Australians are a crazy bunch aren't they...selecting a couple of animals who can't walk backwards to put on their coat of arms...here's an interesting little side note...several species in the animal kingdom can't walk backwards...and ya wanna know why??? Because they're ANIMALS...ya south of the equator idiots...they don't know they can walk backwards...and for most ANIMALS...emus and kangaroos included...walking backwards serves NO purpose...for the most part ANIMALS are prey for bigger...or smarter...ANIMALS...therefore walking in any direction is considered a leisurely past time that they can enjoy when there aren't bigger...or smarter...ANIMALS around who are hunting them... running seems to solve the problem of being something elses supper...running faster then all the animals of the same species...traveling in a herd or pack... significantly increases that particular animal's chances of survival...when ya stop to think about it... the only time humans tend to walk backwards is if they are helpin' another human carry an oversized object...or they're trying to retrace their steps out of a minefield...otherwise...we tend to face forward and conduct our business accordingly...NOW...if you wanna know how to determine which of the 2 humans moving an object is the smarter one...look at the one walking backwards...it isn't that one... that idiot can't see where he is going...and the one person they are trusting to keep them from suffering an injury has a very obstructed view of the path the moron is taking...most other ANIMALS come without opposable thumbs...making them useless...except as pets or protein...why didn't they put koalas and crocodiles on the damn coat of arms...ya don't see these things walking around backwards either... BTW...what's on the U.S.A.'s coat of arms...oh...that's right...we don't have one...because apparently we don't have any ANIMALS on this continent that can't walk backwards...we're just overrun with idiots who balk tackwards...they're called POL-I-TI-CIANS class...unless they're studying to be POL-I-TI-CIANS...in which case they're called LAW-YERS...and believe you me...these people can talk forward...backward...sideways...and out of their asses...all in the same breath...and it all smells the same NO matter which direction it came from...matter of fact I think the name...LAW-YERS... is actually an American misinterpretation...have ya ever been to New England...any of the states up there??? YES...NO...MAYBE...doesn't matter...point is...that is how the word LIARS comes out in that part of the countries distinct dialect...sounds exactly the same...LAW-YERS...LOI-ARS...dead ringer...case closed...that is the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard...emus and kangaroos cannot walk backwards and that's the whole reason they are on the Australian coat of arms...truly worthy of it's own pedestal of ignorance...ya don't suppose that one of the reasons...and probably the MAIN REASON...if I had to take a stab at guessing what it was...is that when humans settled that continent 2 of the most PLENTIFUL ANIMALS on it were...EMUS and KANGAROOS...and that perhaps it wasn't discovered until some time later that these 2 ANIMALS couldn't walk backwards...because here's the thing...I don't give a shit how boring the journey across the ocean was to get there...they didn't sit on the ship thinkin' up dumbass ideas for the next continent's coat of arms...it's NOT as if they embarked on a mission to discover a specific continent...south of the equator...that had a couple of animals that couldn't walk backwards...and I'm fairly certain it wasn't like the crew sat around casting secret ballots from a specific set of choices revolving around the concept of creating this new coat of arms...#1 an awe inspiring coral reef...one of the biggest on the planet...coupled with Aborigines...the native people of the continent...#2 the outback...coupled with wild dogs that we'll later call Dingos...or #3 an ANIMAL who carries its young around in a pouch...and an ugly f**kin' bird like creature...(oh...and NEITHER of them can walk backwards or the deal is off)...and what they all voted for #3...searched the whole damn island and that's what they came up with...EMUS and KANGAROOS...doubtful... woulda taken a few months to round up every available ANIMAL species...and countless years to determine which ones could be trained to walk backwards...by the time they woulda figured out which 2 ANIMALS they wanted to go with...they woulda been conquered and somebody else woulda designed Australia's coat of arms...probably outta kegs of Foster's Lager and a few Shrimp on the Barbie...kinda sad when ya think about it...some dumbass actually believes that's the sole reason EMUS and KANGAROOS got put on the coat of arms...pretty much says it all right there...we need a new law...if you can't formulate a cognitive thought of your own...you can't procreate...end of story...you get one shot...if ya f**k up...sew it shut or chop it off...no more pissin' around...we gotta start eliminating these people who get fully decked out in scuba gear just to go wading in two feet of water in their neighbors plastic kiddie pool...I mean seriously...what's next...I know...I'll offer an American twist on this tidbit...Dumbya couldn't speak forwards...and that's the sole reason he drooled on the arms of coats!!!
