This moron aimed for the bleacher seats and bunted...sure most major Sports Drink Brands are in the business of promoting products that replace valuable nutrients that are lost through the act of perspiring...that doesn't mean they analyzed human sweat...deduced the ingredients being bled from the body...and concocted a drink of the same damn material...adding a little sugar to sweeten the deal...I mean seriously...if this were the case obese people would NEVER hafta worry about finding a career...they'd have one of the laziest and best paying jobs in the world...hell Sports Drinks companies would probably offer to cater fast food every 4 minutes just to keep bottlin' all that bad smellin' body juice...I mean seriously...where did this idiot get his information...there are alotta reasons people sweat...there are also alotta pores and places people sweat from...and quite honestly...there's a huge difference from one part of the body to the next...for instance...SWAMP-ASS SWEAT...is decidedly different from say EYEBROW SWEAT...and one could even argue...the pungent aroma associated with each is quite decipherable...therefore the ingredients of these Sports Drinks would either hafta incorporate each and every element...or be classified separately as a sub-category...put it this way...they would hafta be as different as a bottle of Boone's Farm...and a $200.00 bottle of Vintage Vino...human sweat is dependent upon the individual...personal hygiene comes into play...as does personal grooming...obviously if you look like the missing link when you undress...as opposed to an anatomically incorrect Ken Doll...chances are you have a body sweat only Sasquatch would consider drinkin'...some people sweat with little or NO effort...while others barely break a sweat performing the most strenuous exercises...I try NOT to sweat...that way I don't hafta waste money on a Sports Drink that's supposed to replace the electrolytes I lose...here's the thing...most professionals in the medical world appear to subscribe to the same theory...8 full glasses of...hmmm...I'm like 9.9999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999%positive it's WATER!!! I grew up playin' sports...and we drank water...ate oranges...things like that...because we didn't have fancy flavored sports drinks to choose from...we had Kool-Aid...and when times were really tight...we had Kool-Aid with half the amount of sugar called for...and most of the heroes from the Sports World from that era...wore less padding...played by more barbaric rules...and had lengthier careers than most of the Prima-Donna's of the Sports Drink World of today...I mean what the hell is goin' on here...is someone bein' paid to run around and throw a little sugar on sweaty armpits...take a little lick...and then take a mouthful of the latest batch of Sports Drink...comparison taste testing...ya wanna know where tidbit's like these come from??? Failed advertising careers...that's where...NOBODY reads...or hears that...and thinks to themselves...'Damn...can't wait to get a bottle of my favorite Sports Drink when I'm done in the gym'...they're called Stupi-slogans in the Ad World...or the political field...depending on where ya sit during the elections...8 years of DUMBO...followed by 4 years of GUMBO...and what's on the horizon...4 more years of OBAMANATION...(pronounced A-bom-i-nation)...or 4 years of somethin' called a MITT...who will be the MORON leading us into the post MAYAN calendar millenia...honestly I don't even care anymore...I think we should decide the next President by coin toss...say best outta 7...HEADS the incumbent returns...TAILS the new guy takes over...I mean why the hell NOT...200+ years of leavin' shit for the next guy...anyway...I guess the only thing that should really be of concern to those that enjoy Sports Drinks...is where they're actually gettin' the ingredients for these things they're bottlin'...that could be freshly squeezed from a dirty gym sock...or it could be 3 week old...barrel aged jock strap juice...and depending on the Sports Drink company...it could be imported from sweat shops that employ children from some foreign country...I'm NO recipe-ologist or anything...and I couldn't tell ya what the hell is in those things...but I do know that if you limit the amount of exercise to non-sweat producing endeavors...such as walking at night...when it is cooler...or swimming...you won't find it as necessary to purchase sugar sweetened human body sweat...you can go home and have a beer...Sports Drinks companies advertise and promote good health...or healthy benefits...things that are NOT a requisite for a HAPPY life...I mean seriously...NOBODY has...'Here lies (put your name here) they died HEALTHY'...inscribed on their tombstone...go out kickin' and screamin' like the rest of us...don't fool yourself into thinkin' that livin' a healthier lifestyle is gonna reap you any rewards...look at your own family history...I'll bet the generations before you bathed their food in lard...and they all lived to be into their 90's or 100's...pay attention...it's the healthy sh*t you're eating and drinking NOW...that they didn't have...and woulda avoided if they did...back THEN!!! Have Great Weekend!!!
Thursday, July 26, 2012
Kim- Chee & Dogshit!!!
An apple, onion and potato all have the same taste. The differences in flavor are caused by their smell...
Seriously...the differences in FLAVOR...something that is detected by our sense of TASTE...is dictated by their opposing ODORS...something that is detected by our sense of SMELL...the hell you say...cuz here's the thing...my Momma used ta try and pull that shit on us when we were kids..."hold your nose...that SPAM will taste just like..." AWFUL JELLIED MEAT...I don't give a shit what part of your senses you try and shut off...hold your nose...shut your eyes...plug your ears...and wear gloves...the shit is gonna taste the same...like some sorta spongy substitute for sustenance...it makes a decidedly unpleasant PLOP when it finally releases the vacuum seal created by the gelatinous goo they pack it in the can with...shelf life...5,000+ years...or 3 nuclear devastating global episodes...whichever comes first...they're all about the same size and of relatively the same shape...so if they all taste the same...then what you're tellin' me...is that we're all paying different prices for these products because of their SMELL...we're paying for the fragrance of the food now...as opposed to the taste or nutritional value...well isn't that just a buncha bullshit...and if this little tidbit is true...then how do you explain Kim-Chee & Dogshit...they taste and smell the same...and yet look NOTHING alike...I mean I know there is a direct relation to SMELL and TASTE...normally if something smells foul or sour...rotten or decayed...we refrain from eating it...at least until we get someone else to try it first...and here's the other thing...I'm NO brain surgical magician or anything like that...don't even have any letters following my name...or preceding it for that matter...but one thing I am pretty damn sure of is this...you could blindfold me...put one of gramma's old wooden clothespins on my nose...cut up some apples...taters...and onions and feed them to me in any order you desire and I would be able to tell the difference...wanna know why??? Thought ya might...DIFFERENT CONSISTENCIES associated with the various fruits and vegetables...raw potatoes...FEEL NOTHING like raw onions...or raw apples for that matter...when placed upon the tongue and introduced to the oral cavern I chew my food with...it's really fairly simple...they are all gonna react differently when bitten into...have ya ever had taters with onions in them...like say hash browns O'Brien for instance...yeah...me too...and I've NEVER taken a mouthful of those tasty little morsels and thought to myself...WOW...this tastes like a feels awkwardly like I'm masticating a buncha apples...NOPE...not one single time...NOR have I ever had Dutch Apple pie and thought to myself...NOW who in the hell put onions in here...it just doesn't happen...think about it folks...if this were true...couldn't ya just substitute them for each other in recipes...without anyone noticing...doctor up some potato soup with apples if they happen to be on sale that day...can't be too hard to find something that smells like taters...just to fool the other senses...RIGHT...I love tidbits like this...because you could substitute any other fruits and vegetables and come up with the same thing...sure aroma has alot to do with a person's willingness to try something...but it doesn't trick them into believing they're eating something they're not...I suppose if you had lost your sense of smell you might not be as opposed to trying some of the fouler smelling foods from various cuisines...and the food might take on a sort of blandness...but I doubt very seriously you wouldn't be able to tell the difference between two food groups on consistency alone...potatoes seldom burst with the juiciness of an apple...onions seldom come apart with a bite like an apple or potato...since they are formed in layers...don't be fooled into thinkin' that when you go home tonight and wanna make Steak and fried taters...that throwin' Spam and apples on the stove is gonna come out like a 5 star cuisine...it isn't gonna happen...ya know what would make these items taste the same??? Helen Keller...or someone like her...born deaf...dumb and blind...then you could tell them whatever ya wanted...how the hell would they know...logically sane people aren't gonna fall for this kinda bullshit...well most won't...there will be a few that read this and decided to go have some of McDonald's Kid's Meal apple fries just to be sure...but they walk around with bibs and should be easy to spot...Have a Great Day folks!!!
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