In Ft. Lauderdale, Fla., in the late 50's thru early 70's there was a dentist named Dunat Yelle...
I don't know about you but in my opinion this...to me anyways...reflects the pure genius of this dentists parents...name their kid Dunat Yelle and then guide him in the direction of dentistry...if only more parents had the premonition to name their children accordingly...can you imagine...lawyers with names like Imma Lyar...or for the middle eastern lawyer...Allah Bout Prophet...at least their names would enlighten you as to what to expect...show up at the doctors office and see the name plate on the door...I. Carvemup...or Dat Hertz...the possiblities are endless...Bling Bling would no longer be used to describe what hip hop artists wear in excess...it would be the name of a Chinese telephone operator...Bling...Bling...Herro...or how about for drunken native Americans...Running Yellow Water...or the blind Irishman...Ike Antsy MacOckeneymorra...I mean if people had names like these a person would no immediately upon being introduced whether or not they wished to associate with them on any level...I know it would help me out immensely...then maybe people wouldn't be so apt to believe everything that comes out of others mouths...take for instance our recent experience with the 'Paranormal Experts'...had that genius been named Moronsa Wate...chances are nobody woulda given a second thought to anything they hafta say...or had they been named I.C. Sheets...tends to lose what respectability they may have otherwise duped masses of minions to believe in...I keep waiting...and watching the tv patiently...hoping that eventually I'll catch a weather report down south...where they interview Deysa Ternada Cummins...that elusive redneck weather predicter who just happens to know the exact date and time their trailer is gonna be blown away!!! Keep your eyes peeled folks for...Dey Walker Mongus...you may know them by other names...but rest assured they do exist!!! LOL!!!
Sunday, November 6, 2011
11/06/11
Scientists have discovered that North Atlantic Herring have a unique way of communicating called FRT
Okay...so I'm watchin a program on Animal Planet the other night about the 10 loudest animals on the planet...and believe it or not the North Atlantic Herring was on the list...a buncha scientists got together in 2003 and conducted a study using high tech equipment to determine what...if any...kinda sound a school of Herring made...much to their surprise...mine as well...it was determined that Herring pass gas which releases bubbles and emits a high frequency noise...it has been suggested that they use this technique to communicate...the scientists who made this discovery named this peculiar noise Fast Repetitive Tick...or FRT...I have a couple issues with this...1) Who funds fish fart finding expeditions??? I mean how do you spend all that time and money on obtaining an education...just to wake up one morning get halfway thru the shit, shower, and shave routine...look in the mirror and think to yourself..."Ya know what I'm gonna do today...find someone to financially back my foray into finding a fish that farts?" Who in their right mind hears this proposition...and thinks..."Well Hell Yes I'll fund your little fish fart finding boat trip" 2) How in the world do you make the assesment that Herring use this as a form of communication? Don't all living things pass gas? I know my animals do...and I have no doubt they aren't tryin to communicate a damn thing...much like humans...we pass gas otherwise our bodies would fill up with methane and explode...trust me a little teaspoon fart is far easier to deal with than shit filled combustible human flesh bags poppin on every street corner...these scientists however...reason that since a Herring emits a high frequency noise only heard by other Herring...when they FRT...that it must be a form of communication...hmmm...I beg to differ...I myself have released several thousand SBD's in my lifetime...emitting the faintest of sounds upon exit...probably only audible to dogs within a city block...and not once was I attempting to communicate with them or anyone else for that matter...on some occassions this little act causes people to go running...screaming...theres even been a few teary eyed gaggers here and there...but not once was I attempting to convey a secret message to anyone of them...perhaps the Herring are much the same way...they school together in the thousands for protection...one practical joker starts off with a little FRT...knowing that the rest aren't goin anywhere for fear of gettin eaten...and before ya know it the whole school of Herring get in on it...passin gas...laughin it up at the boatload full of idiots with who showed up this afternoon with high tech listening equipment to record fish farts!!!
Okay...so I'm watchin a program on Animal Planet the other night about the 10 loudest animals on the planet...and believe it or not the North Atlantic Herring was on the list...a buncha scientists got together in 2003 and conducted a study using high tech equipment to determine what...if any...kinda sound a school of Herring made...much to their surprise...mine as well...it was determined that Herring pass gas which releases bubbles and emits a high frequency noise...it has been suggested that they use this technique to communicate...the scientists who made this discovery named this peculiar noise Fast Repetitive Tick...or FRT...I have a couple issues with this...1) Who funds fish fart finding expeditions??? I mean how do you spend all that time and money on obtaining an education...just to wake up one morning get halfway thru the shit, shower, and shave routine...look in the mirror and think to yourself..."Ya know what I'm gonna do today...find someone to financially back my foray into finding a fish that farts?" Who in their right mind hears this proposition...and thinks..."Well Hell Yes I'll fund your little fish fart finding boat trip" 2) How in the world do you make the assesment that Herring use this as a form of communication? Don't all living things pass gas? I know my animals do...and I have no doubt they aren't tryin to communicate a damn thing...much like humans...we pass gas otherwise our bodies would fill up with methane and explode...trust me a little teaspoon fart is far easier to deal with than shit filled combustible human flesh bags poppin on every street corner...these scientists however...reason that since a Herring emits a high frequency noise only heard by other Herring...when they FRT...that it must be a form of communication...hmmm...I beg to differ...I myself have released several thousand SBD's in my lifetime...emitting the faintest of sounds upon exit...probably only audible to dogs within a city block...and not once was I attempting to communicate with them or anyone else for that matter...on some occassions this little act causes people to go running...screaming...theres even been a few teary eyed gaggers here and there...but not once was I attempting to convey a secret message to anyone of them...perhaps the Herring are much the same way...they school together in the thousands for protection...one practical joker starts off with a little FRT...knowing that the rest aren't goin anywhere for fear of gettin eaten...and before ya know it the whole school of Herring get in on it...passin gas...laughin it up at the boatload full of idiots with who showed up this afternoon with high tech listening equipment to record fish farts!!!
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