...read the TITLE...it wasn't the state of Michigan that did this...it was a bunch of those idiots that graduated over in Lansing...bastard step children of the ONLY true college in this neck of the country UM...they're the only dumbasses I can think of that would even speak to a beaver...the rest of us know what to do with those things...beat them to death with our third lower limb...the rest of us wouldn't ever consider trying to sue a furry little patch of freshly shaved follicles...maybe the bitch that houses the beaver if it's infected...but NEVER the beaver itself...hell most of the guys I know won't even spend more than $50.00 on dinner for their dam building dates...if they can't get the river to flow through the canyon after that...they just give up and move on...$10,000.00 just to try and get a beaver to remove her dam...NOT even if it's platinum plated and trimmed in gold with 4th of July Freedom sparks shooting out of her ass...hell I'm so frivolous and frugal you'd be lucky to get me to splurge for a beer just to take a peek at a beaver...in this day and age of inefficient economics I have other things to waste my non valuable pocket paper on...although I probably shouldn't neglect to mention that anyone that has lived with a beaver bearer for more than a year has already spent a far greater wad of worthless paper on their ongoing project...but we are veering off track here a little bit...the booger about this bit that bugs me the most is why didn't they follow through with the threat??? What in the wide wild world of bi-peninsula plots of pulp is goin' on here??? It's quite simple really...somebody from Ann Arbor happened to be walking by and told those dolts at State that beavers couldn't talk...and while an industrious member of the animal kingdom they were drastically under compensated for their architecture...I am somewhat surprised tho...the majority of MSU graduates I run across have trouble formulating an idea that goes much beyond spitting out...'Paper or Plastic'...when they're bagging my groceries...I know some of you are fans of old Sparty...the skirt wearing mascot of MSU sports programs...who probably doubled as the Valedictorian for his graduating class...but don't look to me for an apology or forgiveness for your transgressions regarding collegiate sports...it is NOT my fault that UM graduates have degrees that earn them in excess of $10,000.00 a year...maybe you shouldn't have wasted your time and money educating yourselves on the proper fast food drive thru window etiquette...'you want fries with that'... buncha hair lipped hunch backed beaver suists...and I know what some of you are thinkin'...this is hypocritical rhetoric considering I constantly and emphatically discourage any and all from absorbing anything offered by a public education facility...and while I hold to that theory even as it applies to 'collage edumacated' maggots...one must choose sides in the battle between state school teams showcased in the Big Ten...and for some their selection stems from family tradition...while for others it is based on nothing more than a preference for a color combination...but how should a transplant...non-native make such a selection...the same way UM graduates/fans and faculty do...by asking yourself one simple question...that being..."When faced with having to tangle with an enormous Grizzly Bear having NOTHING more than the hair on your back and your hands and feet as weapons...which creature is more likely to STAND and do battle with the bear???" That's right folks...Spartans without spears...swords and shields are but mere tasty mortal morsels for Grizzlies... while the WOLVERINE is a fierce and ferocious adversary that warrants an extremely wide berth...that being said I would avoid dating UM friendly females as their beavers might have sharper teeth...claws and a nasty disposition!!!
No comments:
Post a Comment