PUSSY PATROL!!!

In the state of Colorado, a pet cat, if loose, must have a tail-light...

And what purpose would this little tail attaching device have???  Have you ever seen a cat run down the street in the same direction as the normal traffic flow???  NO...cat's run across the road...showing a profile of their bodies which...when viewed would NOT alert an onlooker as to the nifty little lite swinging from their posterior parts...does Colorado have a problem with cats breaking down in lanes of traffic all over the state???  Doubtful...cats do not require ethanol or under the hood automotive maintenance...and why oh why...please tell me why...a tail light is necessary...but head lamps and turn signals are not...I mean...in order to put a law of this nature on the books...somebody in that great state had to envision cats crowding the streets of the cities and towns...stands to reason you would want them to abide by all traffic related laws...is the light supposed to help you find your cat at night when it doesn't come home??? If so...here's a little clue for the would be residential cat hunters of Colorado...CATS by nature are curious...they are investigative...they are free spirits that depend on you for very little of their everyday needs...they come and go as they please...and NO matter how long and hard you look for them...or how loud you holler their names through the midnight air...they will return when they see fit...tail light or NOT...maybe it has to do with the relaxed marijuana laws they recently passed...trust me NOTHING beats seeing a flashing light signalling an approaching pussy...at least for most potheads...since they are too lazy to go out and find any for themselves...I love the wording of this tidbit..."If loose"...how many half witted wombats are running the show over there in Colorado???  Where is it normal to tie your cat out on a leash in this country??? And you also notice there is no time differential stipulated...so your free spirited feline hasta have a tail light on even in broad daylight...how ridiculous is that??? What is most interesting is the fact that there appears to be NO stipulation requiring said tail light attachment to be in proper working order...just that one hasta be in place...kinda reminds me of our friends to the north in Canada...don't hafta have a UFO...just a launching pad or landing strip...in case one appears...utterly and completely f**ktarded...I have a distinct feeling that this law was passed through the continuous efforts of an Asian-American lobbyist with a vested interest in Oriental restaurants within the state...perhaps to make it easier for them to target tasty entree material due to their inherent squinting and lack of round eye sight...I could be wrong...but having visited my fair share of Chinese eating establishments...I dare say there aren't that many ways to cook chicken...NOR are there enough chickens on Earth to supplement the needs of these palatable palaces...so half that shit is either cat...dog...or rat...especially those fancy little Teriyaki Chicken kabob lookin' things...PLEASE...chicken does NOT look like that...beheaded...de-limbed rat bodies on the other hand seem to fit perfectly with the features of this delicacy...considering that Colorado is a hotbed of news worthy material as of late...beginning with Columbine several years ago...theater shootings...relaxed marijuana laws...and stricter gun control...I am pretty damn sure I want ABSOLUTELY NOTHING to do with that state...I mean who in their right mind wants to move to an area where law abiding citizens are stripped of their right to protect themselves...raging lunatics slaughter innocent civilians...and recreational marijuana users chase tail lights on cats for fun...since cow tipping has probably been outlawed...hell the ONLY commodity they have left is SNOW...and I am the world's largest opponent of populating snow covered regions of the world...so IMLTHO (In My Less Than Humble Opinion)...we could drop a star from the flag and let those floaties see if they can gain access to Canada as another province for all I care...what a catastrophic model of incompetence!!!