The name "Tiny Tim" was chosen only after 'Little Larry,' 'Puny Pete,' & 'Small Sam,' were discarded...
...and there ya have it folks...the politically correct term for merry little knee cappin' midgets is 'TINY'...no 'Mini Mikey's' in this bunch...like any word used to describe dwarfism isn't going to be politically incorrect...including 'Tiny'...you can call them whatever you want tho really...and remain fairly confident of 'little' retribution...unless of course our name is Gulliver...in which case...as they say in Liliputia...you be f**ked...and here's why you shouldn't word about which word you call them by...they can't run...well not that fast anyway...obviously...if you're poking fun at their potential for achieving a similar altitude...chances are you can run faster...otherwise you wouldn't be enjoying the moment...I feel bad for short people...I really do...they go through a lot...they are seldom taken seriously and have to constantly battle for acceptance among the general population...but hey...who doesn't like to take in a nice midget mud-rasslin' match on a mundane Monday night from time to time...I know I sure would if it was available...hey what better way to show your support for the short...than by spendin' a 'little' money on a pittance of a past time..I'm actually thankful for the little bastards...if ti wasn't for them we probably wouldn't have shot glasses...which were actually invented to serve as a suitable substitute for a regular tumbler...and then where would we be...left at the mercy of the bartender...and as some in my family are all too aware of...that is a bad place to be...depending on said bartender's potential for mixing potent potions...I mean if we didn't have shot glasses we'd have a higher rate of alcoholism because people wouldn't be regulated in how much liquor was use in the recipe for the drink being ordered...so there are many of you who should thank your lucky stars these pigmies even exist...these little people are a blast to pal around with too...not that I know first hand...but I would hafta think that anyone with a penchant for dating dwarfs would find them very cheap dates...one stiff drink and you might find yourself getting a numby from something no taller than a night stand...Little Lolita might turn out to be the best thing at the bar come 2:00am...there's no tellin what kinda kinky shit these short bred bed bugs are into...you might find yourself in the middle of some mind blowin' midget rodeo sexcapade...ya really never know what you're in for when ya go out partyin' with the puddle swimmin' pedestrians...cute compact curbhoppers that they are...they have some of the loftiest attitudes and egos...short little Shetland pony samurais...you really shouldn't poke fun at the pygmy peoples of the planet...if you are incapacitate and cannot easily run circles around them while placing a hand on their forehead...otherwise the enjoyment factor will be drastically reduced...I love these little guys...I know it's hard to tell by the tiny terminology I have used to depict these tempest like tantrum throwing trolls...but I really do...they remind me of what each of us wishes we could do with large land mammals we would like to keep as pets...it's nature's way of telling us it is possible to shrink other animal life for our pleasure and entertainment...we just hafta figure out which genes to modify...stem cell research anyone...it's not like we haven't done it already...there are several versions of miniature domestic pet species...modified in a mammal mutating manufacturing farm somewhere...but seriously...do you have any idea how fun it is having half pints for party pals...they are extremely cost effective to buy for...Toy's 'R Us has some great ideas for new houses and vehicles...and Toddler clothing isn't that expensive either...so before you go talkin' bad about Thumbelina...ya might wanna tip your tumbler in a toast to "TINY TIM'!!!
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