THE SHADY BUNCH!!!

Here's the story of an ugly lady
Whose bullet proof 'do was void of curls
Infamous for telling nothing more than lies
Stay tuned as the next one unfurls

Here's a story, of a man named Barry
Who is busy destroying America all on his own
On Benghazi and now beloved Boston
This man has been left standing all alone

Till the one day when the bitch met the bastard
And they sat down secretly plotting over lunch
Then this group somehow formed a fascist front
That is how they became the Shady Bunch
The Shady Bunch

That's the way they all became the Shady Bunch
The Shady Bunch

I copied the pic...but I Yankoviced the lyrics myself Kevin Wixson

TASTY TOBACCO SUPPLEMENTS!!!

Smokers generally eat more sugar than non-smokers...

...this is one of those moments when someone found something online and took it completely out of context...smokers trying to quit an addictive habit generally eat more sugar than non-smokers...because they are trying to occupy their time and refrain from lighting up...now there are smokers such as the one pictured below who do not use savory supplements of the sugary variety in order to blow sweet smoke up your ass...

kinda looks like a poster boy for the Black Panthers or a Welcome Back Kotter reject don't he??? Little Barry in his Bomber's Jacket...posing for the camera's in what could easily be misconstrued as a photo of an African American anti-government white race hater...funny how his same administration now authorizes various government agencies to spy on people that are labeled in stereotypical fashion...I must say as an appreciator of intelligent linguistic monologues he does possess a far superior grasp of the English language than his predecessor...(who still causes me to try and push #1 for translation every time I see him speak)...but this guy's cognitive capacitor is just as corrupt and illogical as any of the Bush babies before him...here are a few examples of how Barry blows smoke in one direction while indisputably adhering to an entirely different set of principles...our chain smoking Commander in Chief has begged us as American citizens not to let the actions of a few radical Muslim terrorists serve as the basis by which we judge them all...yet he has NO problem using the actions of a few gun toting nut jobs to promote the need for stricter gun control...Barry wants all law abiding gun owners to submit to background checks...yet has done EVERYTHING in his power to prevent a personal background check on himself...how many of you have bothered to read the fine print of his much heralded Obamacare plan???  Are you aware that you NO longer have a voice in the debate over Pro Choice vs. Pro Life???  This little plan of his has restructured the funds necessary to carry out an abortion...these doctor's bills are now paid for with U.S. tax dollars...that's right folks...NO matter what your views on abortion are...if you pay taxes you may as well carry a baby tossing pitchfork in your back pocket...oh how sweet the smell of his tobacco tainted breath when it is blowing for winds of change he is unwilling to accept for himself...enough about that assbag...I didn't vote for him or anyone else for that matter...but I did originally have high hopes for the first African American President here in the United States...boy was I wrong...I've NEVER seen anyone systematically destroy 200+ years of hard work trying to reform a nation for the benefit of a specific ethnicity only to set that same group back centuries...smoking has become so taboo in this country that less than half a century ago we were witness to advertising campaigns that promoted smoking as a way to be kewl...be part of the "in" crowd...everyone smoked...Bogey smoked...The Duke smoked...if your ass was seen outside the house you had a cigarette in your mouth...30 years ago I was 15 and living in Hawai'i...I could buy cigarettes out of the back of a truck outside school and smoke off campus...the following year we moved back to the mainland...all the way to NC...the tobacco capital of the entire world...cigarettes were almost 75% cheaper to buy...I NEVER once got carded for buying cigarettes from the local gas station or convenience store...and the High School I went to had a "STUDENT SMOKING PATIO" on campus...located right outside the windows of the Teacher's cafeteria...you didn't need to be 18 to smoke on campus or carry tobacco products of any kind...you didn't need a permission slip from your parents...all you needed was a cigarette and something to light it with...about 15 years ago the Continental Smoking Shift began to take shape...advertisements for cigarettes were the first things to go...NO more billboards...NO more TV commercials...NO more radio ads...you were lucky if you had a sandwich board advertisement in your establishment...Smoking sections were instituted in restaurants...they branched off to all other public places where smoking was still allowed...some interior establishments banned them outright...then one of the most HYPOCRITICAL things to ever occur in a sporting industry took place...NASCAR racing...the illegitimate bastard afterbirth of the Prohibition Era...an industry born from the ashes of criminal activity to bootleg hooch during a time when alcohol was banned...dropped Winston as its major sponsor...it also banned tobacco companies of any kind from sponsoring any of the race teams...when you go to a NASCAR event today you can't even smoke in the stands...but you can buy beer...enter the modern day and some places on this planet have developed a better than God complex...making it illegal for you to smoke outdoors at all in any place deemed a public platform...it wouldn't be so bad if smoking was the ONLY industry affected by bans and policies and laws...but we see it every where we look...around every corner...a handful of people get a hair up their ass about something and we end up with some sort of ban for that product just to please them...whatever happened to common sense in this country...we are so ass backward in our logical thinking I could go on forever...if you do NOT smoke...and you do NOT like the smell of smoke or the harmful secondhand side effects of cigarette smoke...then by all means remove YOURSELF from the offending source...I don't like people that eat NOTHING but vegetables...who run around launching butt mudd marbles of methane gas...and act like their shit don't stink...but you don't see a nationwide push to ban vegetables from menus do ya...or to have special sections where Vegans can eat...NO because meat eaters have the common sense to get the f**k outta dodge before the foliage farts start flowing...if you do NOT like guns...or people that have them legally...then by all means move your ass to France or marry into a Native American tribe...NONE of those ethnicities know how to use them anyway...you will fit right in...if you do NOT like abortions or people that find them an acceptable means to an end...then do NOT vote for political power hungry pricks like the current POTUS...(ya know if ya took the TU outta that acronym it would fit better)...it's a simple process people...laws are by nature RESTRICTIVE...we have more laws in place than we do FREEDOMS...the original Bill of Rights contained 10...10 rights/freedoms/common sense RULES for us to live by...for us to be able to proclaim our nation as the ONLY self-governed country on Earth...10 rights...10 Commandments...it wasn't a coincidence...NOW we have 27 Amendments...the last 17 are NO longer necessary...they should be repealed...(I know there were a couple that directly applied to the abolition of slavery...WTFU we were all born into state and federal slavery... involuntary servitude...unless of course you get a thrill out of working your ass off and sending the government part of your paycheck)...and we have so many federal laws on the books that the Library of Congress has lost count...not to mention state laws in the same amount if not individually higher in some cases...I think George Carlin said it best..."rights aren't 'rights' if someone can take 'em away; they're privileges. That's all we have ever had in this country a Bill of Temporary Privileges. And if you read the news, even badly, you know that every year that list gets shorter and shorter"...

“The more numerous the laws, the more corrupt the government.” — Gaius Cornelius Tacitus (56-117) Roman orator, lawyer, senator and historian

Here's my plan...we should revert back to the original 10 Amendments and add an 11th..."Congress shall pass NO laws that affect citizens that they themselves are NOT willing to abide by and citizens shall abide by NO laws Congress passes and does NOT practice themselves"...we'll call it the Good For The Gander Amendment...I'll tell ya there are quite a few places I'd like to shove a lit cigarette right now...but I dare say the tobacco companies could ill afford an enormous depletion in stock of that nature...Have a great weekend!!!

OBSEITY EPIDEMIC!!!

Modern diets contain so many preservatives that dead human bodies do not deteriorate as quickly as they used to...

I have absolutely NO doubt whatsoever that this tidbit does contain some truth to it...it also contains some very revealing facts about people in general as well as the government agencies in place to protect the interests of the populace...for one there is NOTHING traditional about the modern diet...we as people...and especially as American citizens have been comforted and coddled for decades...this has spilled over into our food sources...decades ago your parents and grandparents grew their own food...harvested their own food...canned...dehydrated and stored their own food...from grains to goats they were self-reliant out of the necessity to survive...many of us today would be unable to SURVIVE an event such as the Great Depression...simply because we lack the knowledge to carry out many of these self-reliant tasks...if we can't find it on the store shelves it must NOT be meant for us to eat...people that live in concentrated areas of population...metropolitan regions...NYC...LA...Chicago to name a few...have absolutely NO idea what a farm animal or plant looks like...at least for the most part...unless they see pictures of it in a book... should these people ever find themselves in dire circumstances...they will starve and serve as road kill for rodents...another glaring fact found from this tidbit is that the FDA really doesn't give two shits about your health or well-being...it is a complex process carried out in conjunction with the major health heroes of our country...you can't operate a hospital at maximum efficiency if everyone on the planet is in good health...preservatives added to food generally have long term side effects for humans and are more than likely responsible for the significant increases in deadly diseases we are faced with today...cancers...YAY...itsa vicious cycle...the FDA approves the shit...sheeple eat the shit because its supposed to be good for you...you end up in the hospital...the hospitals and doctors profit from your presence and the FDA gets kickbacks from the major medical industry...I know...I know...some of you think I'm just blowing smoke...but I dare say statistics support this theory...people of the past lived longer and usually healthier lives than people do today...hell my own grandmother knew NOAH on a first name basis...claims to have stowed away for the 40 day voyage...and she canned enough of her own food that after she finally passed away we had a canned goods sale that's still going on...and she has been gone now for almost two years...now I don't currently subscribe to a grow it yourself lifestyle...ONLY because I do NOT have the land available to do so...but I do employ smart shopping exercises and purchase what I can from the local farmer's market when I can...it supports the local economy and it generally consists of organic supplies free from pesticides...now if you live in an area like Detroit this isn't something I would recommend...simply because many of the local farms around big cities are part of the commercial industry and their crops are sprayed with pesticides and pollutants as part of their agreement with the parent company...buying from them just cuts out the middle man at the canning company...it doesn't result in healthy organic supplements...get outside of the city...by a distance of at least two hours before you begin looking for a farmer's market to shop from...buy in bulk and can your own crap...it isn't a difficult process and storage is rather simple...if you fancy a feast at the fast food chain on a daily basis...BRAVO for you...archaeologists in the year 3575 will be able to unearth your carcass and discover all kinds of pertinent information regarding life back in the medieval times of the Information & Technology Age we live in today...while you may NOT be doing much for your own health and well-being...you should still be applauded and heralded for your futuristic foresight...think of where we would be right now if we weren't able to uncover remains of distant civilizations today...probably without a shit ton of misinformation...that's where...so you are doing your part to help future generations fail to come up with a logical explanation of how people lived in the past...that or you are just a lazy SOB with more money than you need...you should adopt Liberal principles and donate more money every tax year to help out all of the welfare recipients and illegal aliens your ilk deem acceptable...I used to eat that crap from fast food joints here and there but NOT anymore...I climbed into a vehicle one time...suffice to say owned by one of my offspring...and reached under the seat to search for a lighter that had dropped out of my pocket...I discovered a burger box among other things...I pulled it out of the way to continue my search...leaving the burger box on the floorboard across from me...when said offspring noticed the burger box they asked where I found that...when I explained it was under the seat...they proceeded to tell me they lost it 3-4 weeks ago and wondered where it went...they thought one of their friends had taken it as a joke on the night it went missing...I opened the burger box just to see if anyone had actually started eating it before stashing it in a secret location and forgetting about it...it had about 1/3 of it missing...bite marks in place...aside from that you woulda thought that damn thing was part of an exhibit at a wax museum...needless to say I very seldom even acknowledge fast food joints unless I am in an absolute rush for time and need something to prevent the onset of ill temper and mannerisms...I find it keeps me from going on a rampage and choking the shit out of those that deserve it...yes I probably have enough preservatives in me to add a few days to my underground shelf life...but that doesn't really matter to me...I plan on having a Viking funeral...NO I don't have any Nordic Heritage that I know of...Irish...German...Czech and Bohemian...so it's close enough...we came over on boats...I plan to leave on one...so for people like myself...eating fast food...or commercially grown foods groups packed with preservatives...the ensuing fire from the well placed flaming arrows should be quite a spectacle and burn well into the wee hours of the following morning...if NOT serve as an eternal floating flame configuration...gotta love living in the land of capitalism...all ya need to do is have enough financial folding paper to throw around in the right directions and you can get laws passed and programs for pesticides passed...I quit calling it money because it really has NO value...I know some of you think I'm just a screw loose citizen with an ingrown ass hair about the currency system we so faithfully follow...apparently I am NOT the ONLY one with a sense of humor about this subject...the Federal Reserve thinks paper money is such a joke they redesigned it with a secret color scheme...you can see comparisons in the picture below...

Still think itsa joke???  NOT very funny when the Federal Reserve has the same exact power entitled to the BANKER of a Monopoly Board game...if you read the rules of Monopoly...when the BANK runs out of money...the BANKER can manufacture more using strips of paper...and comparable colors to designate different denominations...I know this doesn't have much to do with preservatives in the modern diet as far as commercial food groups of the current era are concerned...but it sheds some light on how covertly revealing federal agencies...and those illegally associated with it (Federal Reserve) are and how they feel about the very people that remain silent and unconcerned about the systems they present as acceptable and plausible...this all paints a picture of a disaster in the making...they dumb us down and plant bad information in our heads to get us to BUY into the BS...most people in this country are completely out of tune with reality...they do NOT believe that this type of stuff happens here in America...WTFU people...America is often the shining example by which all other countries decide to follow suit...a lot of what we see around the world started here in America...yet we blame it on others because we are told to do so...do you think TERRORISM got its roots in the Middle East???  Obviously you didn't pay attention in US History class...prior to the Revolutionary War all combatants met on the battle field and fought in close quarters combat configurations...this has been well-documented throughout history...some were on horseback...some were stationary...and some were foot soldiers...but they all met on a field and battled until their was a decided Victor...during the Revolutionary War...American regimental troops and militias were formed among the citizenry...a NEW warrior was created...known as a Sniper...these were trained hunters and therefore sharp shooters...their primary function was to setup and shoot senior officers of the British Army...the thought was that if you got rid of the command structure the underling troops would run helter skelter for the nearest boat and head back to England...in other words they were to strike fear and TERROR into the hearts of the enemy by remaining unseen...yes modern terrorism...much like the modern diet...has undergone significant changes and advances...but they are both homegrown products of a different era...don't believe what they tell you...believe what they omit from telling you...it is often far more revealing!!!

SP...SP...SP...SP...OH HELL SPIT IT OUT!!!

The average talker sprays about 300 microscopic saliva droplets per minute, about 2.5 droplets per word....

I've no doubt that this tidbit holds some water...ya don't even hafta do a scientific study to determine how accurate the information is...you just need to stand in close proximity to someone orating to an audience...personally I believe this to be a small saliva shower situation if you are standing next to an average American citizen that has passed Elementary English...it grows exponentially when you apply it to being in the front of unaverage American citizens...for instance if you transition your position and end up in front of a pants around the patella patron...who is attending post Elementary level education but hasn't grasped the linguistic techniques to properly 'nunsheate' words...you may find yourself in need of a towel to trap and contain the excessive mouth moisture these morons mist their minions with...if you move down the evolutionary ladder and find yourself in the presence of an employee of the state run national media...you will find that they enunciate words correctly...they just don't ever get their facts straight the first time around...this leads one to require an umbrella for personal spittal protection...since there will be ongoing reports...retractions...updates...wash...rinse...repeat...it's a bathing experience in bullshit...if you step down another rung on the chatter ladder...you will com come upon the local politician...this group of saliva spraying shit for brains come from all four corners of the planet...they have dialects and ignorance to blame for their fire hose force of verbal flatulence...one may need to seek shelter in a hurricane shelter if the gas spewing from such a gullet of useless information begins to blow their hair back and cause mascara to run...one step lower on the rhetoric rung brings us to the federal level politician...these asshats have trouble reading teleprompters...so it stands to reason how abhorrently they have murdelated the language and spirit of the Constitution...when these anti-patriot elitists gather together in the halls of Congress...anyone in attendance should don a spit deflecting scuba suit slathered in baby oil...it is the ONLY way to wade through the bullshit and get to the bottom of things...at the lowest possible depths of the language ladder is the POTUS...past and present...the individual holding this position is NOTHING more than a misguided marionette ...a familiar face for sheeple to associate with...very few of them have ever had a sane... cognitive...logical thought flow through the frontal lobe of their follicle container...the people running for this position may or may not have a command of the English language...case in pointification...DUBYA couldn't spell "nucular" without a dictionary...ODRAMA can...but he hasta have someone whisper it in his ear...these people are by far the worst orators in the history of man...when they separate the rosy blossomed binding units of their vocal orifice and allow words to fall from it...one would be wise to seek asylum in a submarine...you need something with a thick hull capable of withstanding significant changes in atmospheric pressure...put it this way...you don't wanna be calling on NOAH to build you a bullshit proof boat...you'll undoubtedly drown before that Biblical figure bangs home the first nail...I haven't heard anything lucid come out of a President's mouth since Ronald Reagan...and he was a f**kin' actor...so it was probably scripted straight out of Hollywood...I mean the guy did have a bullet proof...wind tunnel tested hair style...I doubt very seriously he left his script writers back on the West coast...fortunately I have little to worry about when it comes to federal fumigation formats...if I wanna any lip off of them I can scrape it off my zipper!!!

THE FINE ART OF FIRE!!!

A perfectly clean fire produces almost no smoke. Smoke simply means that a fire is not burning properly and that bits of unburned material are escaping...

Really genius...so what you are telling me is that smoke is NOT a direct result of the fuel source  being used to keep said fire going...interesting...I must confess that is the single dumbest statement I have read in years...well ever since my favorite political puppet hung up his ears and went into hiding...if you start a fire using damp...moist or soaking wet wood...you will find that smoke is going to be a huge part of keeping that fire going...this smoke doesn't indicate that unburned material is floating away into the atmosphere...it means that FIRE...a naturally HOT element...is interacting negatively with the WATER...a naturally WET element...present in the wood...this generally produces smoke and steam which is inseparable and therefore will NOT condense and fall back into the fire snuffing it out...a perfectly clean fire of natural gas origins will produce no visible smoke...that does NOT mean that there aren't chemical elements rising from the flames and spreading into the surrounding environment...smoke is basically a gas and is a by-product of all FIRES...you CANNOT have one without the other...to prove this theory all one needs to understand is how backdraft works...when a contained environment becomes inundated with smoke...the smoke backs up and creates enormous pressure...(probably due to the expansion of gaseous elements within)...once access is gained to said environment...(kicking it in or smashing through an adjoining wall as in the case of firemen)...the smoke mixes with the influx of oxygen creating a highly combustible atmosphere...a single spark or flame present in the general vicinity is enough to cause an EXPLOSION...if smoke were simply 'unburned material' finding a way to escape it would settle on the floor and dissipate in a trapped environment and then be reabsorbed as fuel by the FIRE as it spread...holy fecal matter in the frontal lobe area...SMOKE can also be an early warning sign that FIRE is imminent...ever seen someone try to start a FIRE with a bow and drill...if they DON'T see SMOKE...they know they aren't going to have much success starting a FIRE...I have learned alotta bout FIRE here in the past few months...I can start a FIRE in a Force 5 Hurricane...and I carry ALL of the equipment to manufacture FIRE on my person EVERY SINGLE DAY...I can make a fire with a 9 volt battery and an old piece of steel wool...given enough time I could show you how to make a FIRE with a piece of ICE...SMOKE indicates that the process is working as expected and that the potential for FIRE is significantly greater than it was just mere moments ago...once I build a FIRE I am less concerned about the presence of SMOKE...the ONLY time SMOKE matters is when it is in a trapped environment...in which case it is highly toxic and often leads to IMMINENT death...the source of the fuel for the FIRE is what causes SMOKE or the apparent absence of SMOKE...drier and cleaner fuels still release toxic chemicals which form SMOKE...they appear less visible because they dissipate more rapidly than do sources that contain an excess of moisture...that's why you look for deadfall while you are out camping to start and keep a FIRE going...rather than cutting down live saplings or trees which would require an enormous heat source to dry them out and convert them into kindling...I can get a raging fire to burn properly and still produce an abundance of SMOKE...simply by adding some plastic or a tire to the mix...does that mean it isn't a clean FIRE or that it isn't burning properly...NO...it means that plastic and rubber have an adverse reaction when subjected to FIRE...ya ever cook food over an open flame...char a little animal flesh in the FIRE pit...gets a little SMOKY doesn't it...does it ever cause the FIRE to go out???  NOT if you know WTF you're doing...this flaming fart smeller knows more about BLOWING SMOKE than he does about FIRE!!!

ASTRO-CLIMATOLOGY 101

Winds on Saturn can reach speeds of 1,100 miles per hour...

That is interesting in so many ways I don't even know where to begin to start...I have so many ideas floating through my head it's gonna be one of those shootin' fish in a f**kin' barrel kinda days...so bear with me...funny how wind speeds on Saturn can reach 1100mph and yet all the ancient civilizations considered Mercury to be the fleet footed messenger of the gods...somebody missed an astronomy class...Saturn was a god of agriculture... liberation...and time...Father Time in other words...with little concern for speed...since he could adjust time to meet his needs...fast...slow...or at a standstill...that little morsel of interplanetary nomenclature for planets would therefore entice logical thinkers to postulate that perhaps the wind speeds are not actually in the 1100mph range but appear so due to the hastening of time ancient civilizations thought that planet was capable of...more than likely due to its elongated orbital flight path around the Solar system...unlike several of its astral neighbors that had a more concise and easier to document rising and setting during the seasonal changes here on Earth...NEXT...lemme point out what should be obvious to everyone with an IQ above the 2 digit middle identifier of the SSN...climatologists on this planet...Earth...the one we live on and are most familiar with...have a long lopsided history of F**KIN' up the weather report on a daily basis...and they have billion dollar instruments and equipment at their disposal...what does that tell us???  If they CANNOT accurately predict the weather here...how in the name of Uranus can you believe anything they have to say about wind speeds on Saturn...last I knew Voyager simply made an orbital pass...I do NOT recall it launching a spear shaped wind sock holding device into the soil of Saturn...the dumbest part of this equation is the definition of planetary wind...as in wind on every other planet but Earth...it is described as the outgassing of chemical elements from the atmosphere of said planet into outer space...outgassing...I like that...stellar flatulence in other words...the expelling of gases from the atmosphere to outer space...how the hell do you measure that through a telescope from trillions of miles away...especially when you can't even tell me what the hell is going on in the funnel cloud of a tornado with an accuracy...NEXT...the author assumes that Saturians operate much like Americans by thumbing their noses at the metric system which has been adopted by every other civilization on planet Earth...and more than likely the entire galaxy...what a shining example of how to be so full of yourself your head swells...I mean with wind speeds of that magnitude why NOT beef them up a bit by saying they reach staggering heights of 1770.278 kph...it's much more universally awe inspiring...NEXT...recent scientific shenanigans have made it possible for some in the less than accurate with information community hypothesize that the speed of light is NOT a known constant...since we base all other forms of speed off of this information...who truly knows what how fast planets pass gas into the vast reaches of outer space...these people are a step above Bigfoot Hunters but ONLY because they wasted enough money to get a degree in...IDKSHITOLOGY...they couldn't find their asses if they had maps to it printed on the palms of their hands...yet they can confidently proclaim wind speeds of other planets...don't get me wrong...there is a place for science within society...it is an educational format for discovery...but the bullshit meter for theories muddies the water of factual findings...to put it simply...if you can't show me a hang glider screaming blue mercy while soaring through the skies of Saturn strapped to a sheet being tossed around at 1100 mph...save your trumped up theories for the Weather Channel...I don't watch that shit...and NEVER will so long as I have the ability to cognitively recognize the view from my front window...moral of this story...there are idiots among us...and will continue to be until such a time as we collectively implement my selective gene pool screening certification system...people without proof for their theories are the biggest pollutants on this planet...and don't try to flip that around on me...I do NOT prove my theories because they more often than not incorporate logical thinking parameters that keep me from looking too damn mentally challenged to mount a thought worth mentioning!

ASIAN INSECT SUSHI

Termites will follow a line drawn by an ink pen...

 ...and who is the genius behind this little morsel of information???  Why it would appear as if it came from the honolabuh Kolean scilentist...a leal Einstein of his ela...Doctol of Maline Biorogy...Un Duh Da Seah...whose part time hobbies include...insectrah gatheling...to accomplish this feat the honolabuh doctol Seah uses Japanese Saki soaked sushi to att...att...att -lack (I think he means attract...not real sure...let's see where this goes)...telmites...(you can push #1 for English at anytime during this post...and I will fong you like the little hyper red-headed dude in A Knight's Tale...there will be pain...lots and lots of pain)...as you are all aware some sushit (and NO...that is not a typographical error...have you tried this stuff...it's like kim-chee and fish emulsion wrapped in seaweed that smells like soiled dirty diapers)...consists of squid...that ink emitting amazing creature of the oceans aquarium...so I believe what the narrator is attempting to suggest is that this discovery was made while the good doctol was disposing of his leftover lunch by an enormous termite hill...I could be wrong though...it isn't too farfetched to imagine this coming from one of our very own federally funded fiascoes...where they authorize triple digit millions to further study interesting concepts like...brain mapping...while simultaneously singing songs of sequestration from the political pulpit...prophesying the outcome of this disastrous plan before spending a single dollar...one would hope...pray or at least think you would want brain worth mapping prior to setting aside millions of taxpayer money for a project doomed for failure...am I the only one that sees the irony of this cesspool system...where cutbacks are somehow always replaced with additional exercises in unnecessary expenditures??? What the hell is going on in this country today...if you woulda told my Grandpa Rebec that the federal government was spending his hard earned taxpayer dollars to fund research to determine if termites would follow a line drawn by an ink pen...he woulda gladly grabbed that pen in both hands and drawn a line with it...from the floor through your asshole to such depths you'da sworn you were being invaded by a microscopic insect once the termites trickled across your teeth...I abhor how passive the population has become...I am just waiting for the day when they announce the results of the testing conducted to see if cops actually waste more time at donut shops...than they do harassing people because of their inferiority complex...but I will be honest with you...I am hoping that this tidbit is factual...not that I have any termites of my own that I want to train for the flea circus...but it has given me an interesting new idea that I may just market...of course I will hafta do some checking with the copyright and patent people to see if I can even pull this off...but hell it may just be worth the time and trouble...don't tell anyone but here's the plan...Imma invest my life savings in Bic...that's right...the pen manufacturer...they already have all the ink dispensing products one could ever need...one I have control of the company through share holding acquisitions...I am going to corner the market on the termite extermination industry...I'll use the valuable skills I obtained through door to door sales techniques working for the Kirby Company...and walk from house to house selling personal pocket termite protectors...f**k off it'sa new niche...don't criticize me...95% of people who read that tidbit at another site are going to believe it without batting an eyebrow...some of them are at home right this minute drawing exit ramps for the termites to vacate the property...why wouldn't I try and maximize potential and earn a profit...they buy that bullsh*t they'll buy my pens at a slightly higher markup...it's economics people...supply and demand...as I now own the pen producing plant...I control the supply and therefore the price...NO I didn't take a class in economics...open your eyes you play the game everyday...usually at a higher rate than you should...seriously...you laugh now...just wait and see...in the near future there will be KMW's handheld termite eradicating tools in every household...please don't ask for a discount...I can ill afford to support the dumb...if you are waiting for the products to come out...you obviously misunderstood the meaning of this paragraph of pancakes dripping with syrupy sarcasm...Have a Great Weekend!!!

THE DEPTH OF DARKNESS!!!

If you were born during the day, chances are you're a boy. If you were born at night, chances are you're a girl...

so sayeth the dipshit...so sayeth the mentally depraved...thus we must enjoy heated debate on this subject...listen if you were born during the day...chances are you have seen the light and are aware of all that is unsavory upon this Earth...if thoust was born at night...chances are you are still sitting around with your head up your ass listening to the natterings of those with an inherent lack of logical and cognitive thinking...I was born at night...and not just any night either...but Devil's Night...the darkest of nights if ever there were such a thing...and I am neither ignorant...nor do I require sitting for the purpose of vacating liquid waste water from my bowels...coincidentally my daughter was born during the day...and my sons at night...and while I view many of the things they do as assinine and ridiculous...they are far from ignorant...perhaps not as street wise as I would prefer...but book smart to beat the band...could they brawl their way out of a street fight like their old man was fond of doing back in his day...probably not...but there are sacrifices we make when raising our children and I do not regret a one of them...well I take that back...I'm really not fond of being stuck in Northern Michigan...but that is of my own damn doing and I'd rather not get side-tracked into relating that episode in ignorance...suffice to say I have learned from my mistakes and with a "do over" button I woulda moved an equatorial sand strewn beach environment before raising kids...(note to self...if reincarnation is proven to be an actual commodity associated with the afterlife...come back as a permanent resident of a sun soaked seaside society)... now I could be way out in left field here...but if memory serves...and that's a big f**kin' IF these days...(I got Momma visiting www.i-got-the-heimers.com on a daily basis...and it may not be long before I am waiting on site before she gets outta bed and does her daily duties...p.s. go ahead and click on the link it actually works)...I seem to recall from science class that the sex of a baby was determined by something other than the abundance of light...or lack thereof...I believe it was chromosomal in nature...something to do with the genetics of the couple having intercourse...in conjunction with fast moving semen swimmers ...or as I like to call them...egg penetrating penis projectiles...while most infants are conceived during the absence of light...it is not unheard of for barren female fallopian tubes to suddenly secrete ovum while the sun is shining..as a matter of fact...if historical data from the '60's is accurate...there was an enormous amount of free love that resulted in fertility functioning as it should...taking place during the hours of daylight...in public places no less...ya damn hypocritical heathens...it was alright to sink the pink in a park back in your day...with the whole world watching...but good lord don't abide by it now...your children would be corrupted by sexual practices opened to all of society...and if ya buy into that bullshit I have an overload of porn statistics I could throw your way that seem to indicate those you were aiming to protect...are keeping their habits hidden...not because they are embarrassed...but because you would be...I do not visit porn sites...NEVER have...but if I did...I would be hard pressed to determine how in the hell people get into half those positions...I mean far be it from me to point fingers and ridicule...but is that expression of agony...the ball gag...handcuffs...whips...chains...titty tuggers...and penis ring really necessary...that looks more painful than pleasurable...you might be doing something wrong...I mean if that's what you are into...then by all means do NOT let me dissuade you...especially if it's my number you are calling as a potential partner...I would be curious to learn the fine art of fascistic fornication forums...I may be slightly out of it or completely unconscious after it...but I am all about providing others with pleasure...even if it means sacrificing my perspective on pleasure punching the pouty parts of the female body...judge me all you want...I told you I was born on the darkest night at the beginning of this blog...if that wasn't enough of a forewarning you haven't been reading here for very long...was it Richard Pryor who said..."Snort some Coke in a pile"...or am I confusing that with Bill Cosby saying..."Have a Coke and a smile"...either way you get the idea...if you were offended... relax..chances are I wasn't referring to you...(unless of course this is your personal f**king forte...in which case requests for my personal number can be directed to the comments section of this blog and will be replied to if photographic evidence of a revealing nature is attached)...aren't you glad you stopped by today...beats the hell out of a lukewarm cup of coffee to get ya going in the morning...doesn't it???